Thursday, May 05, 2016

My Beauty Secret: Being Present


In the spirit of Mother's Day, Garnier® Whole Blends™ continue to remind us of our unique beauty.


When I was a new mom and overwhelmed, as most new moms are with the task of well, mothering and more specifically, the realization that "you mean I have to take care of it ALL THE TIME?" I quickly started to spiral down in a haze of post-partum depression.

Survival was the name of the game those first few weeks, but quickly I realized that certain patterns and habits weren't going to work long term. For example, hanging the blow dryer on the door handle while it ran at full blast while baby girl napped for 2 hours at a time was not going to work for the next 3 years.

I also realized that if I was going to start feeling better, part of that was taking care of myself, which included getting up, getting showered, getting dressed, and doing my hair and makeup every day. Getting ready in the morning actually became one of my best natural post partum defenses with my first baby. (With subsequent pregnancies it would be actual medication which I highly recommend.) I hope no one sees this as an attack on my fellow mothers or that if you are a yoga pants and hair-in-a-bun, no make-up kind of gal that I am looking down on you. I am not. To each their own. I am simply speaking about what made me feel better. When I look put together, I feel put together. Simple as that. But even more than that I am able to be present. If beauty is about feeling good inside and out, and being the best version of yourself--and I think it is--than being present is one of the best beauty secrets I have.

This reminds me of advice I once heard that a mother gave her daughter: When you go out, get ready, do your make-up, your hair, coordinate your outfit. All of that. As soon as you get out the door, forget about yourself. Sound advice. As a mom this advice rings especially true. If I feel frumpy all day, I check my frumpiness in the mirror, I tug at my hair, I look in the mirror over and over again trying to magically will myself to look and feel pulled-together. If I take the time to get ready, I can forget about myself and BE PRESENT. This is magic. It's a very symbiotic relationship... being present helps me feel beautiful, and feeling beautiful helps me be present.


Since I only wash my hair 1-2 times a week it's important for me to have a deep moisturizing shampoo and conditioner along with a deep conditioning treatment. Enter Garnier® Whole Blends™ that allows you to 'find your blend' and get the best shampoo/conditioner for your hair type. The older I've gotten, my hair has become dryer which is why their Nourishing line with avocado oil and shea butter extracts really fit the bill. Not to mention a deep conditioning mask that I use about once a week. Garnier® Whole Blends™ left my hair soft but clean so I can get a good few days out of one wash and fugetaboutit.

I've also got another little trick for being present and it's definitely one of my best defenses against going ape-shiz crazy during those late afternoon, early evening hours when everyone has obviously boarded the crazy train.

Also, it's 100% natural, drug free, hormone free, gluten free, sugar free and in recent study trials (at my house) the results have been 95% positive.

Music.

When it's 4:45 and the kids are falling apart one-by-one, as they do, and dinner is on your mind, your husband just texted that he's going to be late, and one of your kids breathed on the other kid causing earthquake levels of hysteria and your youngest is grabbing onto your leg making this face:

Try turning on some music.

Music creates energy. Energy affects ambiance. And ambiance creates moods. It's true. Probably scientific even. Here's what will happen, if you have the right music on--for the family I often choose the golden oldies station on Pandora--a new energy will come in the house, spirits will be lifted and the entire mood can shift. I kid you not, I have watched my children stop mid-argument to start dancing a great song that just came on. (This Du-Wop gem is a current favorite.) This has happened in real life! Which doesn't surprise me because if I have the choice between yelling at my sister or getting down to a groovy beat, groovy beat is going to win every time.


BUT sometimes the kids have their impenetrable mood-boosting force-fields on, and the mood doesn't shift and the chaos continues. Well a different magical thing can happen with music--the circumstances don't change, but something inside me changes. The music becomes like the soundtrack to my life, and like a movie soundtrack the music helps me notice what is really important, once again keeping me present. When a great song is playing in the background, and chaos is unfolding around me I feel differently about it all and I realize that these crazy moments are just as precious as the calm moments. Craziness and chaos bring their own texture and feel to life that adds to, not subtracts from, the whole. A song with a sentimental vibe to it brings my awareness to these fleeting days with young children and shoot, it really will all be gone one day won't it? Soak it up. An upbeat, female power song makes me feel like I can handle. this. shiz. No way a few whiny kids are going to bring me down. And a funk-filled dance tune just helps me embrace the chaos and dance through it anyway because really, what can you do?


So there you are, my very best tips for being present and feeling good about yourself. I'm curious to know if any other moms out there also feel the need to get ready in order to feel best about themselves? Do you find getting yourself ready also helps you be more present? Any other tips or secrets for being present? I'm all ears! Leave a comment for a chance to win a $100 Visa Gift Card.

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127 comments:

  1. Music is awesome. And I need a deep conditioner... My aging hair is getting so dry!

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  2. Music is awesome. And I need a deep conditioner... My aging hair is getting so dry!

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  3. My kids are 10 and 4...honestly I find that the more I let them settle their own disputes, the happier we all are. :) Haven't tried the music method...but worth a shot!

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  4. I needed both these pro-tips from you. Being pregnant, I'm struggling in the frump and the energy slump departments. Thanks.

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  5. I agree with you that music can really improve your mood and get you motivated.

    mami2jcn at gmail dot com

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  6. tweet--https://twitter.com/mami2jcn/status/728265978140823552

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  7. Yes, getting ready definitely makes me feel more present. I feel better when I look good. I also agree with the music tip.
    kellywcu8888ATgmailDOTcom

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  8. tweet
    https://twitter.com/Kellydpa/status/728267456976986114

    kellywcu8888ATgmailDOTcom

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  9. Carving out alone time. Even if it's just 20 min. And often I use that time for exercise,even if I don't really want to in the moment. Alone time & endorphins for the win!

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  10. Music can really help put me in a good mood and cheer me up! So does dancing and making myself look my best always gives me a lot of confidence!

    jewelwood55(at)gmail(dot)com

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  11. Tweet-https://twitter.com/JewelWood/status/728274364475449344
    jewelwood55(at)gmail(dot)com

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  12. Music really helps me too. Thanks for sharing these tips.

    elena150980 at yahoo dot com

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  13. https://twitter.com/ElenaIstomina/status/728283466622607360

    elena150980 at yahoo dot com

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  14. Music gives me motivation.

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  15. https://mobile.twitter.com/arress83/status/728385419910512640

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  16. I do find that music helps me get things done. I always turn it on while cleaning. It gets me moving and makes the time fly. And when i get things done i feel better about myself.


    eswright18 at gmail dot com

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  17. tweeted
    https://twitter.com/eswright18/status/728396877159235584
    eswright18 at gmail dot com

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  18. I use music to set my mood for each day

    groogruxking40 @ gmail dot com

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  19. tweet-

    https://twitter.com/groogruxking40/status/728398845584019456

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  20. Absolutely the days that I just slouch around I get nothing done but the days I get up get ready first thing I am so much more on my game and I feel better about myself!

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  21. I tweeted
    https://twitter.com/my4boysand1/status/728400475490549760

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  22. Anonymous10:06 PM

    I am present when I turn off the television and computer and enjoy time with friends and family and pets.
    heather hgtempaddy@hotmail.com

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  23. I find that putting my phone on silent and in the other room helps me be present!

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  24. tweet https://twitter.com/yarbr012/status/728553361910472705 yarbr012@gmail.com

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  25. Getting ready makes me feel more put together. I find that prayer really keeps me present and I often listen to music too. yarbr012@gmail.com

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  26. Getting outside everyday helps all of our moods at this house.

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  27. taking a walk helps me

    dlatany at gmail dot com

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  28. https://twitter.com/sweetums82/status/728642204802142209

    dlatany at gmail dot com

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  29. Jessica To4:35 PM

    Taking time to read helps me but I also like to listen to music.
    reklaw422 at Hotmail dot com

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  30. To look my best I make sure to do my hair and makeup.

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  31. https://twitter.com/mommysweetiepie/status/728702907973963776

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  32. Absolutely. I like to have my hair and makeup done to feel my best. Thanks so much.
    rickpeggysmith(at)aol(dot)com

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  33. Tweeted: https://twitter.com/peg42/status/728752168707211264
    Thanks again.
    rickpeggysmith(at)aol(dot)com

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  34. Music always works. Lately I find good books (audiobooks) work as well.
    tcarolinep at gmail dot com

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  35. tweet-https://twitter.com/tcarolinep/status/728760084264816640

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  36. One thing to be present is turn off the electronic! Especially my phone. always help
    amy [at] utry [dot] it

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  37. tweeted:
    https://twitter.com/uTry_it/status/728769103410900993
    amy [at] utry [dot] it

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  38. Absolutely! Getting ready each day makes me feel like the best version of myself!

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  39. MY tweet: https://twitter.com/Michelle83237/status/728784703277305856

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  40. I have long curly hair and that is my favorite feature. truckredford(at)gmail(dot)com

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  41. https://twitter.com/eliza_elliott/status/728988078275072000 truckredford(at)gmail(dot)com

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  42. Taking a little time for myself by taking a daily walk really helps clear my mind and be more present for my family.

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  43. Tweet
    https://twitter.com/clc408/status/729034748505534464

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  44. Yes, I agree that getting ready helps me be more present, especially if you include doing some exercise as part of the morning routine. That really helps improve my mood so I can stay present!
    maddiembrubaker (at) gmail {dot} com

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  45. Tweet link: https://twitter.com/shala_darkstone/status/729079027827408896
    maddiembrubaker (at) gmail {dot} com

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  46. Putting makeup on and getting dresses makes me feel much more motivated.

    njharmonyg at aol dot com

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  47. tweet https://twitter.com/hburmeister/status/729337998265962499

    njharmonyg at aol dot com

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  48. Getting my bed made in the morning, if nothing else happens that day, I made my bed:)

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  49. Getting ready is a huge boost to my confidence. It is something I need to do in order to feel good while going about my day.

    Thanks for the chance to win!
    wildorchid985 at gmail dot com

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  50. tweet--https://twitter.com/WildOrchid985/status/729714584576270337

    wildorchid985 at gmail dot com

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  51. I find that connecting to the outside world really helps me stay present. And I don't mean something major like going for a hike--just looking out the window and noticing a cloud formation, the birds in the yard, the quality of the light, or the flowers currently in bloom can help me become centered and feel more present in the moment.
    [notheranneother {at} gmail {dot} com]

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  52. Here's my tweet about your thoughtful blog post and the Garnier giveaway:
    https://twitter.com/NotherAnneOther/status/730066096540286977
    Thank you!
    [notheranneother {at} gmail {dot} com]

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  53. I always get ready in the mornings, and do my hair and makeup: I feel confident and attractive.

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  54. tweet-https://twitter.com/LuLu_Brown24/status/730094087836049409

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  55. i need to disconnect from the tv and computer to be present

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  56. I feel like I need to get ready to feel the best about myself.

    willgriesmer@yahoo.com

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  57. https://twitter.com/willgriesmer/status/730165406892216320

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  58. Getting ready definitely helps me feel best about myself.

    rachel.griesmer@yahoo.com

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  59. https://twitter.com/RachelGriesmer/status/731648052381917184

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  60. yes getting ready makes a huge difference in how i feel

    debbiebellows (at) gmail (dot) com

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  61. i posted a tweet here:

    https://twitter.com/purplepanda1966/status/732397204187451393

    debbiebellows (at) gmail (dot) com

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  62. I need a spin class and a long run once a week to feel stress-free and relaxed. aleksnearing gmail com

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  63. Have your own time works for me. I go out with my girlfriend one every 2 weeks.

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  64. https://twitter.com/HappyTina0115/status/732661491892162560
    tina19820115@gmail.com

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  65. I like to exercise at least a few times a week outdoors.. getting that me time and fresh air really helps me stay balanced.
    prettyinhotpink6@gmail dot com

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  66. Tweet: https://twitter.com/PrettyHotPink6/status/733082071032291328

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  67. As a guy I always feel the need to get ready for the day and it usually involves me heading out for an early morning run before everyone else gets up. It's the time I use to clear my head and get ready for the day. Some people drink coffee to wake them up, I run!
    jlammers002 at woh dot rr dot com

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  68. I tweeted: https://twitter.com/FireRunner2379/status/733472747855056896.
    jlammers002 at woh dot rr dot com

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  69. I turn off my electronics so I can be present with my family. I always try to look nice even if I have no plans for the day.

    s2s2 at cox dot net

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  70. https://twitter.com/susan1215/status/733727732345905152

    s2s2 at cox dot net

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  71. I try to live in the moment and to be present in the small every day adventures. I don't need to do a lot to get ready, but I do need a shower and some mascara.
    onefrugalgirl AT gmail DOT com

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  72. https://twitter.com/OneFrugalGirl/status/734020777515884546
    onefrugalgirl AT gmail DOT com

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  73. I find time to read books, at least 3 in a month

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  74. I always need to take a little time to myself to destress whether it's running or listening to calming music

    whittikere at yahoo dot com

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  75. https://twitter.com/whittikere/status/734157230887579648 twweeted!

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  76. Yes, if I feel better about myself and prepared for the day ahead - I am more present!
    nuthouse(at)centurytel(dot)net

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  77. Sometimes just when I think I am SO busy, a wonderful, ordinary moment just causes me to drop everything and enjoy the moment because I realize that moment is so much more important than whatever I was so "busy" with. I never regret it!

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  78. Tweeted
    https://twitter.com/rubylorikeet/status/734880253437304832

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  79. Tweet- https://twitter.com/mitadav/status/734945069887856640

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  80. Zumba and Yoga helps me.

    anmeet1@yahoo.com

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  81. Yoga has definitely helped me be more present and disconnecting from technology (at least for a little while)

    linjumimom at aol dot com

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  82. https://twitter.com/linjumimom/status/736779876355723264 tweeted

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  83. feel the need to get ready in order to feel best about themselves? Yes, I try not to stay in yoga pants all day long.... :-(

    Any other tips or secrets for being present? Put on makeup ! That always makes me feel better

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  84. https://twitter.com/dropastitch/status/737020485771264001

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  85. Getting up and getting ready makes a huge difference in my day!

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  86. Tweet https://twitter.com/Lindiac/status/737042871908335616

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  87. I create beautiful moments by being in the present and not worrying about the past or the future.
    Thanks for the contest.
    slehan at juno dot com

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  88. https://twitter.com/slehan/status/737076232206979072

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  89. i take time to work out once a day and don't really care what others think about me....even my mother ;)

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  90. https://twitter.com/raggammuffin/status/737091969940348929

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  91. Always a good tip to get as much sleep as you can! wlbellows at gmail dot com

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  92. I sent a tweet https://twitter.com/electricstar/status/737326297156714498

    wlbellows at gmail dot com

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  93. Going to the movies with my daughter.
    MCantu1019 at aol dot com

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  94. I like to listen to music to get ready.

    rounder9834 @yahoo.com

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  95. tweeted
    https://twitter.com/thomasmurphy40/status/737412147886628864

    rounder9834 @yahoo.com

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  96. tweeted: https://twitter.com/KerryBishop/status/737421237719343104
    nuthouse(at)centurytel(dot)net

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  97. https://mobile.twitter.com/Esham4life/status/737427202531295232 shawn92379@gmail.com

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  98. Being present for me is spending some time in the fresh air shawn92379@gmail.com

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  99. https://mobile.twitter.com/Esham4life/status/737427202531295232 shawn92379@gmail.com

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  100. Music is like therapy. Now that my family are all grown up and have families of their own I like to listen to the music that was popular when they were growing up. Every song reminds me of special times.

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  101. Tweet - https://twitter.com/willitara/status/737458799158534146

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  102. yoga refreshes my mind!

    showstopper474 at gmail dot com

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  103. https://twitter.com/showstopper474/status/737462870385000448

    showstopper474 at gmail dot com

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  104. Taking some "me time" everyday calms and invigorates me!
    Digicats {at} Sbcglobal {dot} Net

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  105. Tweet
    https://twitter.com/MsCarolsueA/status/737541412212727809
    Digicats {at} Sbcglobal {dot} Net

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  106. I love each day Moment by moment and that's my best tips for being present faithjacklynsweeps@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  107. https://mobile.twitter.com/faithjacklynswe/status/737573549406195717 faithjacklynsweeps@gmail.com

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  108. https://mobile.twitter.com/faithjacklynswe/status/737573549406195717 faithjacklynsweeps@gmail.com

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  109. I love each day Moment by moment and that's my best tips for being present faithjacklynsweeps@gmail.com

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  110. I always heard meditation works... although I havent always had the best luck lol afjackly@oakland.edu

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  111. Tweeted too! https://twitter.com/kytah00/status/737601892058947585 afjackly@oakland.edu

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  112. https://twitter.com/ThatTuxedoCat/status/737666960293568512

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  113. I don't have kids but I do have to work at being present. As a nature photographer, I am always taking my camera places and sometimes I get lost in shooting rather than being. Sometimes, I leave my camera at home, no matter how hard that is. It forces me to be present and I need that.
    Angie
    14earth at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete

  114. I tweeted here: https://twitter.com/MsTofuFairy/status/737683563202613248
    Angie
    14earth at gmail dot com

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  115. Kathryn C5:28 PM

    my #SweepstakesEntry tweet:
    https://twitter.com/thrincor/status/737757226081918977

    Kathryn C
    kacor7@hotmail.com

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  116. Kathryn C5:29 PM

    #SweepstakesEntry- comment
    I try to start my day off right every morning with feeling beautiful by eating a healthy breakfast, (delicious fruit protein smoothie) and taking the time out to reflect, be appreciative, say affirmations and get my day started on a positive note. Of course, taking a shower helps too LOL

    Kathryn C
    kacor7@hotmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  117. I have to prepare myself daily, I always make sure to have some me time

    tbarrettno1 at gmail dot com

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  118. tweet https://twitter.com/ChelleB36/status/737783797207433216

    tbarrettno1 at gmail dot com

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  119. I spend more time with kids

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  120. https://twitter.com/momsfocus/status/737796645161684992

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  121. Loved this post. Getting ready for the day helps me fight the blues too!

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  122. Music is for sure my go to. As well as having do over days when things get rough and we all fall apart, we start over.

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  123. Yes taking a bit of time with my make up and hair helps me to be present.
    thank you

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  124. Tweeted https://twitter.com/JalapenoMama/status/737809077959544832

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  125. Liz B.9:51 PM

    Working out after the kids get on the bus. It totally helps me get ready.

    Cheekyohcheeky@yahoo.com

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  126. disconnecting from technology!

    mijulin at cox dot net

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  127. https://twitter.com/mijulinmarie/status/737833754090053633

    mijulin at cox dot net

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